Dumb Movie Weekend

…so what happens if you leave your friends to pick the DVD’s ur about to spend a long, boring weekend watching??

It’s 19:30, pizza is here and someone loads the first disc…TWILIGHT: What a horrible, horrible film that was. An emo’s wet dream, complete with a horrendous male lead that picks his eyebrows out so he can do the “Sad-but-evil” effin’ puppie-eyed grin, and a truly gorgeous female lead wasting her time and talent googling stuff and reading out loud what she sees on screen (like a bad 90’s movie), when she’s not doing that, she simply distills whatever the dude said into one, straight line so that every goon who went to see this film in the theater understands: i.e. “so ur immortal” -say it “you’re a vampire!” (this came right after she uncovered his family’s “big secret” that was hidden for generations, simply by googling a few keywords)…And then she jumps on this guy’s back and he runs like a mule in fast-forward to the top of this mountain (the only place with sunshine apparently… wtf is this, an underground city?) so he can show her what he really looks like in light. The guy stands there…talks with his back facing the camera and unbuttons his shirt, raising my expectations by delaying his “reveal” scene,at this point i am expecting some melted-skin monster or a pale-skin close-to-skeleton figure! He turns around, and all I got was effin glitter on his chest and forehead…like a truck driver leaving a strip club after hours….if the writer thinks he outsmarted an audience by making a vampire beautiful in sunlight he/she is wrong. cause it had the opposite effect! (the female lead did say “they look like diamonds” and “you’re beautiful” though, just in case I still thought that was glitter, she saw they were diamonds 10 feet away from the guy, I could smell the guy’s breath in glorious CU and I still thought that was glitter…)

At that point I decided not to rant, leave my friends finish the damned thing, and browse the net with my laptop. To my great relief, they decided not to finish it either after 15mins or so.
During the same weekend I had to sit through: The earth stood still, Swing Vote and (the not so bad) role models.

You should have watched "Bolt". That was pretty good. That hamster rulez!

"Bolt" and "Bond" are about the only things out worth seeing this week. Great story though!