Girl Next Door (DVD)

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The second-biggest problem I had with the movie, besides its not being very funny, is that it's as hypocritical as anything Hollywood has ever produced. It wants to have it both ways; it wants to show us how corrupt and abasing the porn industry is, while at the same time using an abundance of sex and nudity to sell its own product. Matt is supposed to be a morally upright fellow who learns to let go and be himself and follow his heart. Or something like that. But rather than the movie elevating any moral fiber in anyone or promoting the importance of equal rights or femininity, it exploits them all and degrades everyone concerned for the sake of cheap laughs and titillation. It was made by the same director, Luke Greenfield, who gave us Rob Schneider's "The Animal" a few years earlier.

Finally, a word about the film's "unrated" marketing scheme. It would appear from the keep case that one of the main reasons a prospective buyer might consider getting the disc is to see more of Ms. Cuthbert. Forget about it; it ain't gonna happen. There are several nude scenes in the movie, true, but they do not involve much of Ms. Cuthbert. The "unrated" version of the film is somewhat like the brown cardboard wrapper that fits over the case. It promises something sexually intriguing beneath it, but when you slide it off, it reveals nothing more than the disc's original cover picture.

Be that as it may, "The Girl Next Door," for all its attempts at providing insights into the teenage psyche, is mainly an excuse to ogle girls and to engage in typical clichés, like telling us sexually active guys are studs, sexually active girls are sluts, and adult-movie actresses are whores. I found it a sorry excuse for entertainment and a waste of the talents of several good performers.

Video:
Given that the Fox people usually do an outstanding job transferring their movies to disc, this one is a disappointment. Not that it's bad; it's just ordinary. The widescreen anamorphic image measures a ratio approximately 1.74:1 across a standard television; the colors are fairly rich and realistic; and the picture is clean. Grain shows up to a small degree in nighttime shots, but mostly the screen is clear of unwanted distractions. Detail and definition, however, are only average and not on a par with Fox's better work.

Audio:
The Dolby Digital 5.1 sound reproduction is fine for blasting out loud, boomy bass but not much else. Very little information is fed to the surround speakers, and most of the dialogue is firmly rooted in the center channel. I noticed some use of the surrounds during the Vegas convention scene and later a few birds twittering in the trees, but that was about all. On the plus side, there is nothing openly wrong with the sound, either; it simply does its job with a minimum of fuss and absolutely no glamor.

Extras:
The first and foremost "extra" on this unrated edition is nine minutes of additional material, ostensibly of a sexually provocative nature. But the folks at Fox do not provide any indication of what was added, and the result is hardly provocative. If one is looking for the "more skin, more sex, and more laughs" promised on the unrated edition's packaging, one is in for a disappointment. I didn't notice any more skin or sex here than in most R-rated movies, and if this is the studio's idea of more laughs, I'd hate to have seen the theatrical version. Regardless, the term "unrated" simply means the movie was never submitted to the movie ratings board and not that it should be equated with something NC-17 or X rated.

Anyway, the regular extras include the following: An audio commentary by director Luke Greenfield; several scene-specific commentaries by Emile Hirsch and Elisha Cuthbert; a feature trivia track that shows text info on the screen; a nine-minute promo, "A Look Next Door"; a seven-minute featurette, "The Eli XXXperience"; sixteen supposedly uncensored but harmless deleted and extended scenes, including an alternate ending, with or without commentary; a two-minute gag reel; and a photo gallery. The extras conclude with twenty-eight scene selections; several Fox theatrical trailers, including one for "The Girl Next Door"; English, French, and Spanish spoken languages; and English and Spanish subtitles.

Parting Shots:
"The Girl Next Door" tries to be a sweet "message" picture expounding a wholesome image of love and friendship and bonding and understanding, but what it really wants to do is tantalize, tease, and taunt with sexual innuendos and implied or simulated sex. And if that fails, market the DVD as "unrated," with the promise of even more sex. Nothing works.

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