...packs more fun than a giant wooden horse full of well-greased Greek warriors.
Tools:
Recommend review to a friend »
"Mystery Science Theater 3000" veterans Michael J. Nelson, Bill Corbett, and Kevin Murphy reunite once again to heckle cheesy older films in a series of direct-to-DVD titles as "The Film Crew." This time, the three goofballs ditch the sci-fi theme and lay down their unique style of comedy as they are confined together in a basement working for their boss Bob Honcho. Basically, this loose premise is just a small gag to keep the show flowing as the real hilarity begins after Mr. Honcho calls to request a commentary track for the next film on his list.
Decades before Arnold Schwarzenegger flexed his biceps as "Conan the Barbarian" and Lou Ferrigno shredded his clothing in "The Incredible Hulk," Steve Reeves used his bodybuilding career and title of "Mr. Universe" as a launch pad to blast off into acting. Like Ferrigno, Reeves' chiseled physique landed him the part of the son of Zeus in "Hercules" (1958) and its sequel "Hercules Unchained" (1959). Following those films, Reeves continued his sword and sandal crusade in the 1959 action adventure "The Giant of Marathon" included on this DVD.
"The Giant of Marathon" tells the story of Phillipides (Steve Reeves), a dominant force in the original Olympic games held in ancient Greece. Athletic, intelligent, and boasting a rippling stature sculpted by the gods, the man is the complete package and naturally draws a lot of attention. Phil catches the eye of Teocrito (Sergio Fantoni), a traitor in a secret alliance with the Persians and hopes to reel in the powerful young athlete to join his army. Teocrito enlists the help of his servant Karis (Daniela Rocca) to seduce Phil with her Vulcan eyebrows and private wrestling entertainers to make the whole transition all the more tempting, which may have worked if Phil hadn't first set his eyes on a gorgeous blonde bombshell named Andromeda (Mylene Demongeot). After all, nothing is more sexy than watching a girly-girl without an ounce of athleticism feebly toss a ball around in the park with her equally girly-girlfriends. Dang, I think I need a cigarette after visualizing that statement.
With a Persian invasion near, shown by a bunch of soldiers and horsemen embarking off of a makeshift bamboo raft on the shoreline with some pretty amateurish editing, Athens sends Phil to Sparta for reinforcements. He treks across Greece throwing daggers and spears into the chests of ambushers along the way, and then uses his smarts to steal one of their horses to get the job done faster. Speaking of horses, my lord, don't tell PETA but I'd say a good number of these beasts of burden were harmed during the making of this film. I've never seen so many cavalry units trip and tumble and pile up in pre-CGI times in my life.
During a short intermission skit, Mike expresses his interest in learning more about the historical aspect of Greek battles, so Bill, a self-proclaimed "history knower" rather than the proper "history buff" terminology, uses bits and pieces of their lunch to represent the soldiers to reenact the engagement. It starts out small and innocent enough, but before long food is everywhere and I doubt Mike really absorbed any of Bill's teachings.
Average user rating (1-5):
Not yet rated.
Not yet rated.
[release]23332[/release]