Legend Of Zorro

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First it was titled "Zorro Unmasked," then "The Mask of Zorro 2," "Zorro 2," and "The Return of Zorro," before the powers-that-be finally settled on "The Legend of Zorro." And the original screenplay by Ted Elliott and Terry Rossario, who collaborated on "The Mask of Zorro," "Pirates of the Caribbean," and "Shrek," was replaced by one from "Alias" writers Robert Orci and Alex Kurtz. It's as if the director or producers weren't sure what they wanted. And unfortunately, it shows.

There are times when the sequel has the joyful swashbuckling panache of the original, which was first cinematic reincarnation of El Zorro we saw since Guy Williams carved up those Disney TV scripts with equal measures of stylish action and humor. But there are also moments when the humor is so broad and keester-related, with a mini-Zorro secretly aping his father's antics, that it starts to feel like a time-travel version of "Spy Kids" pitched more at families this time around, squeaking by with a PG rating compared to the original's PG-13. I mean, how many times can you dispatch with the bad guys without really cutting them, stabbing them, or shooting them? And when Elena (Catherine Zeta-Jones) orders Alejandro (Antonio Banderas) out of the house because he spends too much time playing Zorro and later has him served with divorce papers (wait a minute, aren't they Catholic?), leaving Alejandro to feel sorry for himself and get embarrassingly drunk in the presence of his ex-wife's new suitor, we can't help but think this isn't the stuff of legend--it's an ordinary domestic squabble. And I don't know about you, but I hate it when people muck with legends that way.

The one constant is action, with director Martin Campbell admitting on one of the extras that while "The Legend of Zorro" doesn't have the emotional content of the first movie (ya think?), it's still "a helluva romp." He's right. Campbell, you may recall, directed "GoldenEye," and this outing with Zorro has a much more convoluted and "Wild, Wild West"-Bond-like conspiratorial plot than the first film, which kept it pretty simple. In "The Mask of Zorro," Anthony Hopkins taught Banderas to take over for him, with both men having a dual motivation--revenge on those who killed a loved one, and the heroic desire to fight the oppressors on behalf of the people. It was rich vs. poor, the haves vs. the have-nots. And yes, it had action.

Here, it's almost action for the sake of action. Take the opening sequence, for example. The year is 1850 and Californians are voting on statehood. Enter a brimstone-spouting baddie (Nick Chinlund as Jacob McGivens) who turns up with a gang and steals the ballot box. Enter Zorro, who chases them down and retrieves the box. Now, this really isn't much different from all those stopping-runaway-buckboard stunts that Western heroes did, but Campbell milks it . . . and milks it. Same with a later sequence. Personally, I'd rather he spent more time trying to explain a plot that can get awfully confusing.

You've got cross-scar guy terrorizing peasants everywhere and trying to get the deed to certain parcels of land, then you've got two Pinkerton agents who blackmail Elena into getting close to a new aristocrat in town (Rufus Sewell as Armand), a son (Adrian Alonso) who seems out of control, and a priest who functions as Alejandro's Bernardo, and you've got a plot that stretches our ability to comprehend, rather than our ability to feel. While there was still potential for a dual motivation, Zorro's unmasking and descent into ineffectual ordinariness (reminiscent of Superman's or Spider-Man's in those sequels) is so pathetic that the action easily dominates.

For all that narrative convolution, there are still more easy fixes in the sequel than we saw in the original. One ballot box stolen, recovered and presented to the Governor is celebrated as a chance at statehood saved? Come on, people. This was one village. If there was a conspiracy to defraud the election, certainly it would have been territory-wide. That's but one example of a script that expects viewers to not ask too many questions and just accept these tenuous plot threads as a means of connecting the action sequences--which are impressive. In the extras we learn that it's all real stunt work, and we watch stunt doubles sword fighting on a fast-moving train without wires because if they fell the wires could swing them under the big iron wheels.

Despite the dangers, there was only one injury: a smashed ankle, an there were plenty of opportunities. Horses and wagons crash through walls, Elena and Zorro fight two-against-many in a carefully choreographed fencing scene, and there are explosions and fires. All of which is to say that "The Legend of Zorro" is, at best, a passably decent family film, but deserves some credit for trying to stay PG. Be warned, though, that for all the family-feeling Zorro Lite we get here, there are also moments which are NOT family-friendly--as when little Joaquin sees Zorro unmasked and realizes it's his father with a Bowie knife about to slice his jugular vein. That's some pretty traumatic stuff and a 180 from bad guys getting a body full of cactus prickers. The performances are fine--you couldn't expect more from the stars--but the script and direction are over-the-top. It's all style, without the same substance as "The Mask of Zorro."

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