Watcher

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Keanu Reeves is a serial killer in "The Watcher." He also does not say "Woah" once in the entire film. I´m not sure which is the bigger shocker. Poor Keanu has taken more than his share of comments ridiculing his acting talents from this reviewer. "The Watcher" isn´t going to do much to stop that, either. Don´t get me wrong, Mr. Reeves has been in a few very entertaining films, but his typically wooden performances and general lack of acting range has produced more stinkers or under performers than bona-fide successes. With the more talented James Spader, affable Ernie Hudson and the lovely Marisa Tomei, I had hopes that "The Watcher" would be an interesting thriller and Keanu would find a dark and dangerous personality to bring to the screen.

Well, Keanu is Keanu in this movie. He has a little charm with the ladies, but the rest of his performance feels as if the actor has had two drinks and is ready to sit down and watch a football game. He is neither menacing nor intimidating in this film. The motives for his character´s murderous spree are never revealed in a manner that makes sense. The actor has enough charisma to make his character´s way with the ladies to be believable, but he hardly seems like a person driven to strangle these lovely young ladies with a piano wire. There have been many bad casting calls made in the annals of film. And while this isn´t nearly as bad as casting John Wayne as Genghis Khan, Keanu would have been better swapping roles with James Spader, a man who could have been convincing as the serial killer.

I take time in most reviews to provide a short or medium length plot synopsis. It gives the reader a chance to get an idea about the film´s story and whether or not it would be interesting. I try not to give away any details and spoil the fun. The problem with "The Watcher" is that I can neither find much interesting about the film and absolutely no fun to be spoiled. It would be rather difficult to spoil anything in the film, since the only plot twist that is even remotely twisty is the kidnapping of Marisa Tomei´s character. Everything else is either revealed immediately or played out during the film´s snail pacing. When a ninety-seven minute movie feels as if it runs for three hours, there is a problem and this un-interesting and un-fun picture feels like the entire film is a second act and the first act and third act were unceremoniously removed.

If it were not for the inclusion of the seldom seen Ernie Hudson, the always great acting by James Spader and a comical phone conversation between Chris Ellis and Spader, there would be no reason whatsoever to watch "The Watcher." Hudson hasn´t been seen too much since "Ghostbusters," but he is a good actor and underutilized. Chris Ellis´ character enters the film as some kind of super-cop and had that characterization held for the entire film, "The Watcher" would have been a far better film. The rest of this film is just an uninteresting and unentertaining series of moving images. I tried to give "The Watcher" a chance, as James Spader is an actor I enjoy watching. I even believed for a minute that Keanu could throw away his surfer-dude demeanor and pull of being a villain. I was wrong. Do me a favor and go buy one of the far better Universal films released in the same lot. May I recommend "The Big Lebowski?"

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